The deployment – take two

At one thirty this morning me and the boys crashed out at the Village Hotel in Coventry having just dropped Mark off at the airport for his return flight to Afghanistan.  It will be ten weeks until I see him again. 

The past two weeks have been amazing. When Mark left the first time there were traces of him all over – shirts to be ironed, ground coffee in the fridge, wellies by the door.  His absence was everywhere and whilst in those early days it made me feel a little bit a like a widow when it came to him coming home again there was a ready made gap for him to fit right into and it was like he hadn’t been gone at all.  

In the same way Mark was able to walk straight back into his place in our home, within 12 hours of getting home he and Alby were back on track as father and son – giggles, cuddles, reverse sits, bashes and all. (For the record, Mark and Percy were back on track within a second of Mark walking through the door with Percy actually bursting, via a jump and a bark, with excitement at seeing him again.) 

The past two weeks have been amazing.  My boys and I can make a great team and it’s fab when we get the chance to be such.  There have been a lot of smiles, giggles, bashes and cuddles in this house over the past 14 days.  What’s more, I’ve been going to bed by 10pm each night – hurrah!

Alongside the fun, there have been some emotional moments and some testing moments – I’m a wife and a mother and I don’t think it would be possible to be such and not have them, but either way all have been truly positive educational moments.   Parenting is a constantly evolving role and I’m lucky, Mark may not be here all the time but I’m not a single parent and when I get my better half around we get to look at things together, work on things together and look ahead together.  It does challenge me – both in how I look at and respond to things, but that’s good.  I know that I’m a work in progress and I think we should always strive to be better people; to learn, to grow and to develop.

Mark has always inspired me and I enter into the next ten weeks with his words, thoughts and love ringing in my ears.  At the moment I don’t miss him, so strong is his presence that I feel like he’s still here. I didn’t find saying goodbye last night sad or emotional, I’m proud of him – who he is as a husband as a father and as a soldier.  And so the next ten weeks begin.  I’m going to try to be the best wife and mother I can be to all my boys.  The to do lists are already written, I’ve got a stack of reading on my bedside but for now, I’m going to give myself the best gift I can – a good nights sleep.